Brooding in the corner... thinking about high art

I asked a former classmate to give me feedback on who I am in workshop. This was her response:

"I think you are a first-rate addition to workshop. You're a straight shooter with your written and your oral feedback. You don't sugar coat what you want to express and while that may be challenging for softer-skinned people to accept, I find it refreshing and necessary in an environment we've come to for honest feedback. It's a loss not having you in _______'s this semester

I think your strongest asset is your literary critique. Your analyze the piece as if it is already published high art. You try to understand the author's intention and you site textual examples fluidly. You distill your points just so that what you say is often poignant. I only wish you did more so. In some ways you might not be too far from the role you played in workshop last week.

From what you admitted to us as a class, I would urge you not to critique people as they do you. I'm not sure if you experienced this in workshop with me---you would know better than I! We're all exposed. We're all vulnerable. We all need reassurance as much as we need critique. I understand that impulse, and I respect you greatly for admitting it, but that's the only advice I can think to offer. You run the risk of someone doing the same thing to you. If you want to take that risk go for it, but it might be because they've felt snubbed and are taking it out back at you! So to end the cycle, I was just advising go with what's truest to the piece."

I am greatly appreciative for her compliments and honesty, as well as a little surprised that it wasn't apparent when and at whom I was smoldering. I think the last part about ending the cycle is great advice but at a level of maturity I have yet to master. I also don't think that endless critiques will improve my MFA experience. I basically give everyone the benefit of the doubt until they prove otherwise, a.k.a. handing back a paper with absolutely no comments. It doesn't much matter to me why they aren't engaging, they aren't. I would rather have a couple of core people who keep up their end of the bargain in terms of work and really spend my time giving them valuable critiques. However, this is not how I would act at all as a teacher. I TA now, have been in Res Life jobs for a couple of years and am the oldest of six- I am nurturing and I like to be nurturing. I just see my experience and standards for myself as an (PAYING) MFA student as a bit different than what I would allow myself to behave like as a person with authority. I guess students do have a certain amount of authority when it comes to peer analysis as well and perhaps that is something I need to consider more. I have a very hard time being vulnerable when I am uncomfortable. I don't know that I am capable of developing a thicker skin. I just need to find the right environment. The teachers that make the atmosphere such that disrespect and apathy are unacceptable, that are supportive as well as expectant of "good" work. I think because I am so sensitive, I have a hard time being an even-keeled workshop participant. However, this translates to a very understanding person when it comes to teaching, mentoring, or nurturing. I understand the mushy, needy kids as well as the mouthy, pushy ones because it is all things I have tried to deal with my own discomfort in being so damn sensitive!